There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
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please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
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if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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