it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
