Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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