this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
