So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
how does that bad decision feel?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
