sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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