; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
