I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
