There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
