i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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