they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
