its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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