i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
