I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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