It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
