Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
how does that bad decision feel?
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