I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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