That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
