better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
There's always time for handjobs
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
