so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
