my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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