it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
