No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
