im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
