I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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