so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
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Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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