Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
ugly people sure do ruin things
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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