I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
