hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
