I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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