What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I didn't notice because vodka
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
