I love black thongs
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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