New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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