I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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