using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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