I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
The air taste purple.
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