Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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