i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Everything about him screamed your future.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
So much Jack, so little girl.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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