you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize
