Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
