What a fucking waste of an outfit
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
No...this little piggys going to the bar
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
