i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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