Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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