roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Randomize