how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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