Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
