I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
