How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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