i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
