I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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