Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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